


Unexpected Vacation

by AimeeLouWrites



Series: Cursed to Strife [7]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Calamity!Zack, Dimension Travel, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:53:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28780803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AimeeLouWrites/pseuds/AimeeLouWrites
Summary: Cloud wakes up to an enforced vacation thanks to the chillest son of the Calamity he's ever met.
Relationships: Zack Fair & Cloud Strife
Series: Cursed to Strife [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2016314
Comments: 60
Kudos: 323





	Unexpected Vacation

Cloud came to slowly, feeling warm and well-rested. The sound of the ocean’s gentle hiss and crash filled his ears. He couldn’t...remember going to sleep, though. Grimacing, he opened his eyes and sat up. Tried to sit up. He got maybe halfway before the cuffs on his arms stopped him short.

“What the…?” he muttered, realizing several things at once. First, he had sunglasses on and someone had swapped his clothes for swim trunks and a rash guard. Second, his arms were secured to a deck chair with SOLDIER-grade restraints. And third, he couldn’t remember anything after taking his first breath in the latest world.

“Hey, Cloudy!” said Zack from nearby. Baffled, Cloud turned to him and found his cross-dimensional best friend lounging in his own beach chair with a drink in hand. He, unlike Cloud, was unrestrained and waved jauntily. “Had a nice nap?”

“Uh,” said Cloud, as he further realized that one of his younger counterparts was similarly tethered to a chair just beyond Zack, looking awake and thoroughly grumpy in the shade of an umbrella. Beyond him was...the unconscious form of Sephiroth? On a hunch, he turned to look in the other direction and found Commander Hewley _also_ tied to a chair. The man was awake, and heaved a deep sigh when Cloud met his eyes.

“Hey...Zack,” Cloud said slowly. “Did _you_ uh...think I needed a nap?”

“Think!” the weird Zack exclaimed. “Buddy you looked dead on your feet! I’ll be honest, I’m not entirely sure what’s going on with you, but I couldn’t leave my bestie in that state, right?”

“I might have appreciated a warning,” he responded, shifting experimentally. He didn’t _feel_ molested, despite the clothing change, and neither of the other conscious...captives (?) seemed unduly alarmed by their predicaments. So what exactly was going on?

“Pfft, you wouldn’t have listened to me if I’d _asked,”_ weird Zack declared, giving Cloud a _look_ over the rim of his sunglasses. Blue-green cat’s eyes stared out from his face and Cloud drew in a startled breath at the sight.

_Ah._ That would definitely explain it.

“Zack,” he said cautiously, “you didn’t happen to do this because, uh, your mother told you to, right?”

“Huh? Oh, you mean that alien lady? It’s cool, she kinda had it out for Seph so I killed her.”

_What._

“I am so lost right now,” Cloud admitted.

Zack waved a hand. “Look buddy, it’s fiiiiiine!” he crooned. “Hojo did some funky stuff to me, and then I killed him, and then alien lady tried some stuff so I killed her too, and then I was like ‘woah, I’m stronger than Seph now! I can finally make everyone take a vacation!’ and now here we are.” He sipped his drink, seeming very pleased with himself. “You’re just a bonus!”

Cloud opened his mouth. Closed it. Thought deeply for a long minute, staring out to sea. “Okay then. Sure. Not the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to me. Can I uh, get my arms free? And a drink?”

Zack looked outright shocked before a beaming grin crossed his face. “Hey, sure buddy! I’ll be honest, that’s the best reaction I’ve gotten so far!” He hauled himself up, wedging his own drink into the sand so it wouldn’t fall over, and ambled over. When his fingers touched the cuff, he paused and frowned. “You’re not just playing along, right? Because I don’t want to fight you again. You gotta rest man.”

Part of him balked at that phrasing, but arguing just wasn’t worth it. So he said, “Zack, I’m from a different dimension and I’ve been bouncing around for gods know how long. If the worst you’re doing is annoying all of them—” he gestured to the others— “then I’m going to enjoy a nice break until I get forcibly ejected into the next dimension. I’d like my gear back before I leave, though. Especially my Ribbon man, not cool.”

Zack blinked. “Huh,” he said. “Yeah that does explain some things. Sorry about that. I’ll give it back!” He opened the cuffs and ruffled Cloud’s hair. “Sit tight, I’ll go get your stuff and a drink! You deserve it.”

Other Cloud turned to look at him as soon as Zack was out of polite eavesdropping range. “Are you _fucking_ shitting me?” he hissed. “I don’t care if _you_ don’t care, get over here and untie us before he gets back!”

“Nope,” Cloud said, crossing his arms behind his head. “He’s not committing a genocide so I’m going to let this one be your problem.”

“Look, if you could just—” Hewley started, tone cajoling.

“Nope.”

“But we just need—”

_“Nope._ For the next...however many hours, I am on _vacation.”_

* * *

**Bonus: Zack, realizing he now has TWO Clouds**

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> [ Check out my Tumblr for more context to the nonsense that is Calamity!Zack](https://aimeelouart.tumblr.com/)   
> 


End file.
